What type of facebooker are you

But 1, "friends? That's just showing off. The Town Crier. Me, and the , other people who all saw it on TMZ. These Matt Drudge wannabes are the reason many of us learn of breaking news not from TV or news sites but from online social networks.

In their rush to trumpet the news, these people also spread rumors, half-truths and innuendo. No, Jeff Goldblum did not plunge to his death from a New Zealand cliff. The TMIer. Thanks for sharing. The Bad Grammarian. Yes, I know the punctuation rules are different in the digital world. And, no, no one likes a spelling-Nazi schoolmarm. But you sound like a moron. The Sympathy-Baiter. Genuine bad news is one thing, but these manipulative posts are just pleas for attention.

The Lurker. The Peeping Toms of Facebook, these voyeurs are too cautious, or maybe too lazy, to update their status or write on your wall. But once in a while, you'll be talking to them and they'll mention something you posted, so you know they're on your page, hiding in the shadows.

It's just a little creepy. The Crank. These curmudgeons, like the trolls who spew hate in blog comments, never met something they couldn't complain about. The Paparazzo. Ever visit your Facebook page and discover that someone's posted a photo of you from last weekend's party -- a photo you didn't authorize and haven't even seen? You'd really rather not have to explain to your mom why you were leering like a drunken hyena and French-kissing a bottle of Jagermeister.

The Obscurist. How fascinating! No moment is too mundane for these people to broadcast unsolicited messages to the world. This person sends 50 to invitations a day to play Candy Crush and needs to die a slow horrible death. Sign my petition. What drink are you? Thanks for sharing dumbass. The Jokester I love a good joke, but there are some people who take it too far. In the end Facebook is a great medium for staying in touch with people and for expressing yourself.

That includes Employers. Also remember to keep it short, sweet, much like this blog, and tactful and pleasantly agreeable. Just last week I received friend requests from Al Coholic and Ruckus Rimjob and then quickly de-friended them when I realized they were probably fake and sent by a cyber lunatic who wants to steal my identity which would be pretty cool for them.

Maybe they would write shorter weekly commentaries and none of you would miss me. I thought I was going to pee myself. And what was up with everyone flipping the bird? Savage fingered Abi upon exiting tribal council and Kass fingered everyone upon entering. Manners people. Stephen is still a whiny dweeb-nerd who is overthinking everything, which apparently is the new way of playing the game.

Joe has no armpit hair, which is freaking me out. And Ciera is playing big and not planning on going home. You are commenting using your WordPress. You are commenting using your Google account. You are commenting using your Twitter account.

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Notify me of new comments via email. Notify me of new posts via email. The World According to…. The members of this faction are often sounding alarms on big issues, and passing along the latest memes, and see Facebook as the easiest way to do that.

But if the newspapers can successfully fight back through a legal battle, as they hope to , the town criers will be the first to tell you about it— through Facebook.

Their lack of sharing and interacting does not represent a lack of interest in their acquaintances. Most town criers would rather pick up the phone, text, or direct message someone for an actual conversation.

Their ways have spawned a thousand essays on the problem with social media , and contributed to the myth of the narcissistic Millennial. Selfies routinely use the same Facebook features as relationship builders—posting pictures, videos, and status updates—but they do it primarily to call attention to themselves, say the researchers behind this study.

Although the selfies were found to be least concerned about the accuracy of the self they presented online, says Boyle, that tendency could exist in any category. One seductive quality of online interaction generally, Boyle notes, is that people are able to create a better—or different—versions of themselves.

To share our darkest truths, we prefer the perceived anonymity of a Google search. By providing your email, you agree to the Quartz Privacy Policy. Skip to navigation Skip to content.